I feel, at the moment, like I have too many thoughts in my head, so if this is rambling, sorry. I have issues sometimes, putting myself out there here. It's really easy to talk about how much I love Prison Break (so much!) or the Weepies (ditto) but not so easy to talk about the stuff that really matters (not that Prison Break doesn't matter, because I really think it does. Also, Wentworth Miller is very, very pretty). Part of it is because it involves my family, and my family (well, one half of my family anyway) is really, very private. And that has spilled over onto me, all their secrets became mine even though I never agreed to keep them. I've really struggled with that the last few years, honestly it just weighs me down sometimes.
I've been joking for the last few months that I was trying to be nicer for Lent. In reality, I just made this choice, to try to be a nicer person. I can be very kind and sweet and loving to the people I like, but I'm kind of awful to everybody else, at least some of the time. I can be really warm around the people I love, but I don't think I'm really a warm person. Anyway, I'm not sure the being nicer thing is really working out, but I'm trying.
All this leads me to the point of this entry, though I feel like I've been circling around it for ages without actually landing . I have a great aunt who just recently moved to my town to live in the nursing home after a year or more of a lot of drama in her life (which I don't feel comfortable sharing, because that's my story). And I know that the nice person thing to do is go see her because she's had an awful time and I'm sure she's lonely and there are a million other reasons to go. But I don't want to. Because my whole life, this woman has been awful to me. I mean, don't get me wrong, she never like, abused me or anything, she was just mean to me (not just me, either, my cousins too, and actually, probably, every little kid she ever came across. The woman was not child friendly). I just...I don't know. If I was the person I'd like to be, I'd go. I'd forgive her for things that happened years ago and feel sorry for her and go. But since I'm me...I don't go. And I don't even really feel bad about it, and that's what worries me. I'd like to not be that cold.
My hair. After saying for years I was going to grow out my hair and giving up, I'm finally doing it. It's been eleven months since I had any length cut off my hair. It makes me happy every time I see it. 
Picking out flowers. I love walking through the nursery, seeing all the different flowers. So many colors, so inspiring. 
This little shelf, which seems very me right now. Love the letters from Target. Love the drumsticks. Love the picture of me and my momma. 
This shirt, from the dove campaign for real beauty. A cause and a statement I really believe in. I hope they accomplish everything they've set out to and more. 
